Mixed Tapes: Nostalgia

I’ll Never Break Your Heart– Backstreet Boys. Very first boyfriend and I’s song. He ended up cheating on me which is really funny now in hindsight with this being our song. Why were the late 90’s/early 2000s so terrible in style? Nick, what is your hair and your pants? and LOL AJ’s frost tips and mesh shirt. It was such the in thing in high school. This video kind of defines that time period in general, wow. Kevin’s really attractive now that I’m older.

U + Me = Us (Calculus) – 2Ge+her. Omg this train wreck defined my entire freshman year of high school. I know my calculus. I just had to throw this in there after Backstreet Boys. The full movie is on youtube. I know what I’m watching later.

Cherish – Madonna. Second ex and I’s song, sophomore year. The summer of Madonna, the dollar theatre, and vegging out to marathons of 90210 with him. He went on to be in a fairly popular ska band locally, but it amuses me that we ended up picking this of all songs.

Hey Leonardo – Blessed Union of Souls. The best friend of the ex from the previous song, his and I’s song. We ended up dating for a few months after I broke up with the other. I don’t know why this was our song, no more than I know why we were together. There’s irony in it. We hated each other from the very very beginning, then we couldn’t stop making out. Then it was over and we hated each other again. But, this was our song and he used to sing it to me all the time when we were dating.

With or Without You – u2. This song has two very different connections for me. First, was that another class did a ballet/modern dance to it for one of our dance recitals. The other being a close friend of mine, who I was practically in love with. He was in love with one of my best friends and honestly, I liked someone else in our group a bit more, but we kept having terrible sexual tension for a long time every time we hung out together and at one point, he sent me this song saying it reminded him of us and it’s stuck.

Bizarre Love Triangle – New Order. There are some moments in life that just stick with you as one of those times as being a pivotal turning point. Blasting this while going down the five on the way into Los Angeles with my “California family” when I went there to go to the Academy Awards with them in 2003. At some point, I’ll go into further details about this trip because it was life changing for me. This song and Pure Morning by Placebo have the same effect for me about this trip.

Semi Charmed Life – Third Eye Blind. Most amazing karaoke moment of my life. We used to go out a lot after high school to this Chinese restaurant that had karaoke. A friend chose this song, but he was epically failing so the entire group of us (like ten of us) backed him up and sang it with him so he wouldn’t be alone. One of my favorite lines in a song ever is from this too: “And the four right chords can make me cry.”

Party in the USA – Miley Cyrus. A friend of mine recently posted about waking up with this song in his head and we all replied with lyrics. There’s RP memories attached to it too and long hours in Vside. Recently, Drew and I were discussing said friend and we ended up singing the song in its entirety while chilling at the hookah bar. Forever a memory.

Jesus He Knows Me – Genesis. When I was in elementary school, I had a group of guy friends that I spent a lot of time with. One of our favorite past times was reenacting videos we saw on MTV. We totally did this one over and over again. We were totally going to start a band when I was seven based on Genesis and INXS. Probably why I got such a kick out of all the Phil Collins references in American Psycho.

Walking on Broken Glass – Annie Lennox. My first memory of being into historical anything. The video for this song has stuck with me for decades. Took me to adulthood to get the Blackadder reference with Hugh Laurie.

Disloyal Order of Water Buffalos – Fall Out Boy. This whole album defined my divorce. It was my therapy, but this song in particular will always carry those emotions with it for me.

Drive Me Crazy – N’Sync The first time I ever got stoned was my freshman year of high school. We were watching TRL and this video was #1 at the time. I don’t think I’ve laughed as hard at anything. This song and video will always remind me of being stoned now.

The Boy is Mine – Brandy & Monica In beginning drama, we had to do a lip sync project. My best friend and I chose this song and my crush at the time offered to be the guy we were fighting over. For his song, he and his friends did “California Love”, so he was still dressed as a gangster and the whole performance was ridiculous.

12-51 – The Strokes. This is the most fun song to play on the synthesizer. As well as, “Rebellion (Lies)” by Arcade Fire. It was when I started playing these two songs that I realized I can play literally anything by ear even though I can’t read sheet music worth a damn. And I spent about a year pretending I was some sort of musical genius.

Bad Touch – Bloodhound Gang. Church youth group. We took a trip to Mexico my sophomore year. We were screaming this song over and over at the top of our lungs the whole way there. We were the worst Christian group.

She Drives Me Crazy – Fine Young Cannibals. The first video and song I can recall from memory. I was really young but I was completely obsessed with it. Still love it.

Piece of Me – Britney Spears When Britney Spears had her breakdown, I was up north looking after my dad who had just had heart surgery. I stayed up all night with a bunch of my RP partners watching the whole thing go down on the internet. We all played this on loop while our Canadian friend gave the play by play to poor Britney. It was my own mental escape from what I was dealing with at the time.

Lollipop (Candy Man) – Aqua. We did a dance to this in beginning dance my freshman year. Two days before the performance, my dance teacher finally realized it was a song that could be about oral sex and made us change it. We ended up going with “Roses Are Red” because it had the same beat and musical set up, but we were all surprised that we had been playing it on repeat in dance class for months before she finally caught on to what we were doing. I still remember the dance steps. Yes, I just ran through it.

Rosa Parks – Outkast. Another song we did a hip hop dance to in dance class freshman year, though the version we used was mashed up with Moby’s “Honey”. I still remember it entirely and I can’t resist breaking out into it every time I heard it. It’s been thirteen years, and it’s a default setting for me. Other dance honorable mentions: “Personal Jesus” by Depeche Mode, “Cemetery Gates” by Pantera, and “Dead Bodies Everywhere” by Korn which had heavy ballet elements.

Malchick Gay – Tatu. I closely relate this song to a friend of mine, because of the bond we had when he came out of the closet. He came out as gay and I realized my destiny of being Queen of the Fag Hags, because this falling in love with gay men thing has been a theme in my life since him.

Mother & Father – Madonna. The summer after high school, I spent a lot of time in the Phoenix gay community because my friend had come out and I embraced my position. He dated the cutest metrosexual guy I’ve ever met. He was just adorable and fabulous. There was a night after we finished hanging out at the gay bar, Hamburger Mary’s and we were hanging out in the parking lot listening to this CD, blaring it, dancing and singing to this song.


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